Freedom by Beth Maria

Author:Beth Maria [Maria, Beth]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: Literature & Fiction, Romance, New Adult & College
Barnesnoble:
Goodreads: 22728471
Publisher: Beth Maria
Published: 2014-10-06T04:00:00+00:00

Chapter 13

Chloe

It’s been a month since I returned back to college, and up until this last week, everything has been perfect. I’ve been spending most of my time with Jake, and on occasion, we will go out with Maisie and Jesse. Jake and I aren’t a couple yet. I’m still not ready to believe that he will actually change for me this time. So far, he’s proving himself, but it’s still early days. I don’t want to get my hopes up.

College has been going well. I’ve caught up on what I missed in my classes and am back to being near the top of my class.

I haven’t seen or heard from Emerson, Marcus, or the others since before my father’s funeral, though I didn’t expect to. We weren’t exactly friends, just people who felt trapped together, bonded by a drug.

I haven’t felt the need to touch cocaine since my father’s funeral. I had a little bit every now and then to help me cope and get through the day, but I haven’t touched a drop since I’ve been back. I haven’t needed to. I’ve been the happiest I’ve been in a while, spending time with Jake and finally getting to really know him.

This last week though, I’ve been struggling not to call them up and ask them to hook me up with some. I’ve tried so freaking hard, but I feel like my world is closing in on me more and more. Every. Single. Day. And I can’t fool myself and pretend that I don’t need it, because I do. If I don’t get some today, I’m going to go crazy. It’s the only way I can get relief, to be transported to a world that isn’t mine.

I texted Emerson this morning, asking her if she could get me some, to which she replied straight away saying to give her an hour. That’s what I’ve done. I’ve given her an hour, and now I’m standing outside her house, pacing backward and forwards, fighting with myself. Deep down, I know I don’t need this. I can cope without it, but the bigger part of me knows that I can’t. I need this, and lots of it today.

After pacing for near enough ten minutes, I finally gather up the courage to knock on the door and move from foot to foot, waiting for the door to open.

“Nice to see you again,” Emerson says completely out of it, moving out of the way to let me in.

I walk past her and stop in the hallway. “Did you get it?” I ask, getting jittery, wanting to get this over and done with. The drugs are so close, but yet so far away from me right now.

“Yeah, I did. You wanted a lot more than usual though?” There’s a silent question on the end of her sentence, though I’m not willing to answer it. I don’t know her well enough. Plus, we aren’t here to make conversation and become friendly. We’re here to do what we need to do and then go home.

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